Why Did I Let Them Win?

During the preparation of my wedding, I had some anxiety issues, not because I was nervous about the wedding itself but the after effect of nervousness who had some doubts of what man I'm supposed to be for my wife, my future kids, my work and overall image. I needed a distraction in order to really stay balanced and it didn't really work out the way I wanted it to. I joined a forum out of word of mouth and research, it was decent and had some knowledgeable people there but pretty much from the start it became a negative vibe and mentally painful entities that I didn't want to see but it was right in front of my face.

Some of the people on that forum were nice to me and were open to what I had to say and were inspired by me but the majority were just mean, self absorbed assholes that didn't give me the time of day to just have an intellectual conversation about fitness. Some even tried to call me out on bullshit I wasn't even really aware of. I admit I got caught up in it and lashed back at them and it bit me in the ass. I left that forum for a day or 2 than came back but made up the story of being hacked and had restart the process of being there. That blew up in my face and I got bullied again and also fought back in those keyboard wars which now in my mind was so freaking stupid, I just wished somebody would slap me upside the head and tell me to quit being a bitch and let it go. The weird thing is, whether in reality or online at times, it isn't ignoring certain comments. I wear my heart on my sleeve and some of those people made me feel ashamed of that and I let that happen.

Why did I let them win? How could I have been so blind that I didn't see that they were deliberately trying to get under my skin and I let them pin me down just like the kids that pinned me down when I was 12-13 years old and a kid got on top of me and starting beating the crap out of me. I felt sick and appalled that I let that happen to me. The truth is, these same people who think they're knowledgeable, don't have a clue how to be a true human being and put people down because they look different or have to be this way and do things that cater to them. The real truth behind these people is that they hate on and mock one man and his system of exercise and the people who follow him to such a degree that they band together and do nothing but try to "expose" him as a fraud and a frail old man that can't find his way out of a paper bag. Honestly, these are some sick bastards that need more therapy than an assault victim. One of these guys even tried to compare this one man to Hitler for christ sake, the hell is wrong with you?

Now that I'm married, everything is done, had the wedding, went on the most kick ass honeymoon and ready to start my life as a married man, I started seeing things more clearly and remembering the advice Bud Jeffries gave me when I talked to him about the cyberbullying stuff, it has opened my eyes to a different perspective and going through this experience and surviving it mentally and emotionally makes me appreciate more of what the world does offer and the people that love and care about you is a gift. I'm always learning how to be a better human being not just in my self but to those around me and the things I heard out of Bud, my father, my best friend, my wife's best friend, the BFF's mom, my niece and my sister just shook me to my very soul that maybe there is something about me that can grow into this person and what to do with it.

I had quit this forum a second time even though I said I was back for good because the BS these guys kept coming at was overshadowing the real important aspects of training, philosophy, intellectual conversations and other things. I check in on it occasionally but I don't post there anymore and check out the free info I can find on there that has some value. The rest of those guys can go screw themselves and live in their circle jerk world. They have no real value to fitness or to the aspirations of being gentle and loving, they just love to hate on what values others and can't seem to let go of the person they try to "expose" and live a real life that has meaning, positivity and forming a real relationship. They're nothing but keyboard jackasses that live their lives demeaning others. They don't win anymore and I'm not going to lose sleep over their BS about me or the people they hate on. I hope they find peace and learn to just be human instead of trash.

Got Married In A Galaxy Far Far Away And Couldn't Be Any Happier

Did you miss me? I've been gone for more than a month because I was preparing for the biggest day of my life. Times were a little rough, saved up quite a bundle with some help and made it happen with all our friends and family there to celebrate me and my Princess Leia.

The majority of the planning goes to my awesome wife Holly because quite frankly, decision making isn't my thing although I got in some really cool ideas and plenty of ideas we came up with together. One of the best things about this wedding was getting our officiator. The world's strongest man/jedi Bud Jeffries. He did an amazing job with setting things up, telling us what we would like to do and run with it. During the ceremony itself, he made us all laugh to ease some of the extra nerves and just made it so perfect for us.

I'm so thankful for everyone that came out to be there for us and me and my wife are so blessed to have friends Jeremy Farr & Jackie Nicholson for the extra things they did for us and we owe you both a great deal of gratitude. Everyone who pitched in was wonderful and deserves a lot of credit.

A fun thing I got to do since it was Star Wars themed was instead of the traditional tux, I went a completely different route and dressed up as Han Solo for the ceremony. It was super cool and Bud dressed up as Obi-Wan Kenobi. I had the idea of doing music for my groomsmen when they walk out. I also got to dress up as Indiana Jones because that was one of my biggest dreams as he was my all-time favorite character and the films were what I grew up on. Being Indy was definitely a dream come true for me.

It truly was a fun and magical day for me and Holly. I couldn't be any happier and getting to share our nerdiness, love for Star Wars and being our true selves with the rest of our loved ones. This wedding was truly one to remember and can never forget our Anniversary, May 4th LOL. Here are some more pictures from the wedding you'll get a kick out of.

To see more photos, got my facebook page https://www.facebook.com/benjamin.j.bergman

I even did some training days before the wedding with Bud doing Hammer & Kettle Training. Think you'll find these pretty damn cool. Now that I'm back, I'll be writing more frequently and bring you some fun articles and maybe a guest or 2. Have a wonderful day guys and bask in the love of those around you.

Review Of Animal Workouts Book/DVD

This course is a lot of fun to do and gives the reader a series of progressions for each animal and has quality content for doing something different or what you did as a little kid. Most of the issues that come with the program isn't a major factor for me but I do wish the author were more involved with the exercises instead of using models. Don't get me wrong, they are very fit people but it is important to show the readers what YOU can do and inspire them.

David Nordmark is a knowledgeable guy I'm sure but shows more of a copy and paste style as an author selling courses at a cheaper price than folks who wrote previous courses that cover the topics virtually identical. Matt Furey, Ed Baran, Batman O'Brien, Charles Atlas and others wrote courses that dealt with basic to advanced calisthenic movements utilizing traditional Hindu Wrestling Training, Gymnastics, Self Resistance, Isometrics & Flexibility training. These courses are pricey in areas but are well worth it. David wrote courses that carry the same exact exercises and a tad more but sold them half or more cheaper.

The animals based in this book and DVD course are very simple to do and can be done virtually anywhere. I love how playing around with these exercises can make a person fit and healthy in the long run but if one has had previous injuries, some exercises won't cut it for that individual. The principle movements are mainly crawling and jumping which is essential but some people no matter how hard they try, won't have great jumping abilities because of how their tendons and ligaments handle the stress. Overall, one can adjust to the exercises according to their level of energy, flexibility and fitness. You don't have to do the jumping exercises, you can just do squats or hold the positions in an isometric fashion. It's all what you can do and make the most of it.

Although it suggests elements on speed, technique and rest periods, do what you can do. Some exercises I can never speed up on due to previous injuries in my legs and I don't jump that high on some exercises. With the crawling, your body will naturally tell you the speed and the weak links in your body. Take it from me, just play and adjust accordingly. Don't expect to have great strength off the bat and your stamina and endurance will come in time because when you really get into it, it doesn't feel like a workout, more like a game and that mindset can help your results come quicker.

The weight loss & muscle building aspects vary from individual to individual so if you don't lose weight or build muscle right away, it's OK, keep at it and things will eventually happen. You will build natural muscle due to the amount of muscle groups being used during the movements. The more muscles being used, the greater chances of development faster. Have fun with it and get into the mindset of making it a game, it'll change your perspective and develop results you didn't think were possible. Get wild my friends.

Animal Workouts Book

Animal Workouts DVD

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Pushing The Limits....Good Or Bad

Every individual experiences different levels of tolerance or intolerance to soreness, pain, strength, endurance, flexibility, durability and stamina; so we can't fully determine what gives us that balls to the walls limit of understanding how far we can go in our training. There are people who do the Ironman, run Ultra-Marathons, Crossfit like a maniac, train to extremes for bodybuilding or their specific sport and than there are people who feel going beyond the limit is a badge of honor.

Don't get me wrong, testing one's ability is a meaningful goal and every person wants to know within themselves "How far can I take this?" The problem is that too many people strive for this goal way too quickly and it's not always by way of their own choice. Yes we have a choice but we also tend to get caught up in the hype and being told what to do and how to apply ourselves to reach our maximum limit without regarding the consequences of injury, possibly death, becoming crippled, breaking bones, tearing tendons and scarring the psyche for life. It's like driving a Viper and testing it's limits of how fast it can go and getting caught up in that mentality of seeing what it's truly capable of. The car can only take so much and at its highest peak of maximum performance, won't last more than a minute tops. A similar ideal is the cheetah the fastest land animal on earth, at top speed, the wildcat only lasts seconds and only uses that speed for survival and catching food. If this cat were to challenge itself and even remotely test it's speed more than it is meant to, the death scale would be at its highest due to exhaustion, heart beating too fast for the body to handle, the bones would shatter and would be destroying the internal organs.

Like the Viper and Cheetah, the human body can only take so much and everyone, even the greatest athletes in the world have their limits. How we determine what we can tolerate is through experimentation, where the mind is tested, preparation and finding out what we can do to do more and more until we reach complete and utter failure. It is important to challenge yourself but it must be done with intent, understanding when to back off and recover, plus learning your mentality and physical needs. When we are young, we have greater chances of recovering like crazy and have energy that keeps us going and having mental toughness. As we age, recovery takes more time, physical exertion becomes greater in order to provide results and mental strength is at it's apex.

Pushing our limits can be beneficial to a degree but each individual will never have the same limits or abilities as the person next to them. There are some things I can never achieve because of my structure, my strength levels, my tolerance for pain but that other person may not have what I have and won't ever do things that I'm capable of doing. It's all a matter of perspective and understanding how far that person can push their highest levels of the attributes they have acquired or willing to test at their maximum levels. Now the real question is.....If you push beyond your limits, are you willing to suffer the consequences that comes later or during? Or are you willing to find out what you can truly do? This is the real test for every individual. 


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How Can You Trust The Information You Are Given Or Learning?

There's a lot of great free info around fitness websites, forums, blogs, podcasts and much more but while absorbing it, how much of it can be trustworthy and valued to you? Some places have info that is so freakishly basic and generic that it is boring as hell and people just can't always get on board. Some places even have colorful marketing ploys and fonts that just jump out at you and have this exciting look (believe me, I've fallen for it too) but is the info on there just to sell or really help you with your goals?

In my research and learning various methods from isometrics to circuit training, training in gymnastics, some training in submission grappling, strongman feats, bodyweight exercise, weightlifting, sports and others; it is easy to get sucked into something and not look at things on a deeper level. Certain people promote things just for the sake of promoting and not give a damn about what they're truly selling but on the other side of that same coin, people will market and promote things so damn hard that it is the end-all-be-all product along with never looking at anything else but that. What do your instincts tell you when you look at an ad copy? Do you trust what someone is selling or giving it away for free?

Let's cut to the chase, many people market fitness as ways to build income and the majority of marketers only care about selling and don't give a damn who buys it. The magazines, dvds, cds, webinars, youtube videos, kindle books, paperbacks and other digital downloads all play a role in how to drive people to their product or whatever. I will say not all marketers are assholes and do care who buys their product and even gives their gratitude to them in amazing ways.  The people I learned from the most give their blessings to the people who took a chance on them and got incredible results. People like Bud Jeffries, Logan Christopher, Steve Maxwell, Tyler Bramlett and others cater to a certain level of people but will work with the people that want the help. They're not in it just for racking the dough, they treat people with respect and dignity.

Now from my perspective and learning from experience both hands on and on the net, there's very little trust in what I want to learn. I can be a skeptic and have become a follower in certain methods but I never treat anyone like they're a god or some leader of a revolution, just want to learn and see where it takes me. On the net, trust is about as limited as you can get and you have to protect yourself from whom you get involved with. Yes I do have friends in the fitness world and some I even refer to somee as like brothers and I will promote them because I have seen how they treat people and how passionate they are, both are a rare combination in this world.

Most of the free stuff you'll find on the net are mainly on forums and blogs. Some are good, some are great and others are just freaking weird. I have written about some of these forums recently and I have to say, they're entertaining to a degree and have decent knowledge but just because it is free doesn't mean it's always the right way to do things but the same can be said when you pay for something. You have to be instinctive in what you choose and do your best to shield yourself from bullshit stuff. It isn't easy but it isn't impossible either.

I'm learning myself what I trust is the right info for me and have gotten caught up in the bullshit stuff. You really don't want to get into things that these assholes can exploit and make you feel less about yourself because it has happened to me and I hate that feeling. It is a process but remember what is important to you, keeping your goals on track and learn to trust yourself. It is easily seductive wanting to defend everything and developing strong ideals that creates enemies but the true enemy are the people who want to watch the world burn and feed on misery to fill their own ego because they themselves are miserable and become obsessed with being negative towards whatever made them bitter in the first place. Find the trust in the info that suits your interests and goals whether you pay for it or find it without paying a damn thing, you have the power, make it work for you.