I was born July 28th, 1984 in Santa Clara, CA at 5:30 pm. Born 6 pounds 8 ounces and as healthy as you can get. Well over a year later, around 14 months I became ill and my parents didnt know what to do. I was rushed to the hospital where I was born and had taken many tests to find out I had Spinal Menengitis a germ that goes directly from the spinal cord to the brain and made switches in my bodily functions so everything went the oppisite way. There were 2 things supposedly were going to happen to me that the doctors told my family: Either I was gonna die from this disease or if I lived I wouldnt have the brain of more then a ten year old.
I lived and had to learn everything all over again, I was more right sided then so everything shifted and had to learn how to use my left side since my right became weaker. Over the years I was in speech therapy, taking tests to see how sociable my lifestyle and attitudes differ from othr people and if I can co-exist in a normal setting. Learning speech patterns, taking physical therapy in order to strengthen my entire right side and use my left side in the least possible ways. At the age of 3 I couldnt pick up a clothes pin with my right hand cause it was so bad.
I started being in the Special Education programs for the next 15-16 years, learning how to do certain tasks and social skills and reading patterns. I hated it, every minute of it, I just wanted to be a normal kid and play ball and be with normal friends but it wasnt all meant to be. I got picked on on a constant basis and just didnt have the best times around other children and such and didnt always have the best times at home.
As a young teen it became even tougher to deal with other kids and teachers and family cause at one point during that time around 13 I really wanted to do drugs and wanted to be with the popular crowd who was doing them and knew it too. I got beat up a lot around this time mentally and physically and even been in big fights with my best friend at the time. It was hell as you can imagine. The only thing that didnt feel like it could hurt me was my school work. Even wanting to play around a lot I got some good grades and became an honor student with a 3.6 GPA in junior high, I just wanted to be out of school just by getting good grades. I was a fat kid around this time as well at 5'4 180 pounds with no muscle tone whatsoever and got beat for that as well. during 7th grade p.e we started doing weight training and it got me into lifting. Slow start but I got hooked.
After I graduated and went to high school, I got a bit shyer but not as bad as it used to be. I started just wanting to go to classes and just work my ass off to be good at whatever I was taking and it was fun at times but horrifying the next. I did a little weightlifting around my sophmore year and I was hooked on training since then but it wasnt easy. As teens we all developed all those hormones and such that I got angry a lot and I always took it out in the weight room and started developing this natural strength for heavy lifting and I never trained on a routine I just did what was there or added up to it.
At 17 I started to notice that I was good at weights so I challenged a few guys a time or 2 and got beat and won but my greatest achievment was I was challenged to a squat duel lol with a buddy of mine and see how much we can lift, he warmed up I just stood there and started psycing myself up and he wanted me to go first so I put on somewhat 400 pounds on bar (it was a 65 pound bar so less plates were added) and got 3 reps, he got 6. So I wasnt the one who was into losing so we added 100 pounds on my expense and I got the same amount of reps and he tied me. Like I said I wanted to just get this over with so we ended up putting most of the plates in the rack on the bar and it was at I think 615-620 and even though we were screwing around I just wanted to win so I went first and by this time the entire class was watching and some other kids from the track heard us and came in so it was around 40 people. So I closed my eyes and started screaming with everything I had and didnt think anything of it it was just a number to me and hit 2 full reps while yelling and in agonizing pain and came up and put the bar on the rack and the guy who challenged me just flat out went "f*ck that you're crazy" and I was told that by the entire class.
Anywho weights was the thing then and I partcipated in Track & Field for 2 seasons and enjoyed every minute of it and even though I sucked lol it was fun while it lasted. I stopped wanting to do the Special Ed program around my junior year in the last semester and just felt like I can do these things and I wanted to do them. During my senior year I wanted to wrestle but ended up hurting my knee so I stopped and focused on school. Later on before my last semester my stepfather passed away and it couldnt have come at a worse time. I was miserable, angry and just became depressed.
I wanted to hurt somebody everytime they talked or touched me and I cried at least 3 times everyday for most of the year. No one understood and they tried whatever they did and I didnt budge I just didnt want anybody around. He meant the world to me, he was my best friend and he got me through so much even though he was far worse having diebetes and hardly if ever taking his insulin. I just lost it and thought that was it what can I do now that he isnt here anymore.
I will write pt. 2 either tonight or tomorrow so be prepared. You never know what will happen.
Yours in Power & Might
Ben
No comments:
Post a Comment