Battling My Own Demons

This will be a different article than you're use to reading especially when it comes to a different side of me I rarely talk about. So as a warning there will be things you may not like and things you don't want to hear or read but I feel the need to open up a bit.....

A lot of issues that I've had for years have been in my own head and have doubts about myself from time to time that I can't always let go. It's an uphill battle of emotional fitness so do speak and some days I just want to be left alone and need to be in my own element. I struggle with trusting people in my life and there's an extreme few I do trust and two of them are my biggest female influences (yes you're one of them holly my love, you give me hope and love when I need it the most).

I don't easily get depressed because a good portion of the time I end up laughing at the most random things and some people I know just can't deal with it because it's weird and think i'm some kind of freak or something. I do however have a side to me that when I'am down, some people sense it right away and want to help but sometimes you just need to let me be, I'll get out of it eventually and I'm grateful those who do their best to help but I need to be left alone in order to be my best again.

My struggles with trusting people has been a battle with me ever since I was little. People I love and cared about have stabbed me in the back and I never truly got over it and feel alienated by them because I felt used for their benefit. I have been forced into little things that shouldn't be a big deal and a lot of them really weren't but I make them big for some reason. It's not fun being rejected and it definitely isn't fun when its your own flesh and blood, the people you look up to when you were younger. I have been used for my strength, my level of sympathy for others and being used just to be manipulated to help someone else. I'm very much a happy person and I do love what I have and what I have earned money wise, respect from others and what I have received from others that makes me thankful for what I'am. I have a horrible ability to cry and at times when I have it's usually something major and it doesn't last too long. I don't ask for sympathy, I don't ask to be felt sorry for and I certainly don't ask to be praised for; all I do ask is to be heard and form your own outlook and quite frankly because of my nature I do care about what some say good or bad because it's who i'am.

I have tried to please others for so long and be helpful to them in whatever the best I can. I still do on occasion and on those occasions I still get used and fall for it. The only people I truly please these days are the ones that truly matter to me and I don't ask anything in return because they are worth it to me and I do it because I feel it's important for them from the little things to major things that really hit it for them. For those that I do my best to please have become the same people that stabbed me in the back and wanted more than they should've gotten out of me.

I've always been a loving and caring guy; anybody who knows me knows this wholeheartedly and I would go to the ends of the earth for those I feel the closest to. I don't truly hate anyone but there are those that I love so unconditionally it shows and there are those that I do love but can never love to death because of what they have done to me emotionally. I have been beaten up, torn down emotionally and have been physically exhausted from trying to be there that don't give it back a fraction of what I've given and its made me want to punch someone in the face so many times but I don't because to me it'll make me more like them than who I truly am.

Life is never easy no matter who you are or how rich you are or how poor you are and what your status is to society but in the end it's up to you to make it interesting and what YOU can control. We all have demons, some far greater than mine can ever be but push comes to shove I'll be open about myself. I have many influences in my life and that includes the three women in my life that have the biggest on me and that's my mom, my girl and my second mom Juanita. Others include Bud Jeffries, Logan Christopher, Tyler Bramlett, Kevin & Michael Nicholson (my brothers from another mother). These people have shaped my life in ways no one else could even if they don't realize it. I may have my own personal demons but they're the ones that make the light shine brighter than anything else. Whether you think more of me or less it doesn't matter, what matters is that I hope you have a chance to read this and that you know how open I can be. Fitness is not always about being in physical shape or what's better than what, it's about learning how to be fit in areas many never see and what shapes them both inside and outside.

Things Just Keep Coming Together With Primate Training

The power of influence and inspiration can come from anywhere even in a single moment where it only lasts for a mere 10 seconds can change your entire life from then on. That's what gives me the drive to do Primate or Ape/Monkey exercises, its having those little moments that really shine on my brain like for example seeing the updated trailer for Kong: Skull Island inspires me even greater to have that kind of strength, that kind of enormous ability to move and feel like larger than life. Apes truly are the most awesome strength giants of the Animal Kingdom.

It's not easy to walk on your knuckles, let alone be able to speed up and jump while adding in the ability to just hang from a bar for quite a period of time. Even 10 seconds from a dead hang is challenging especially if you're a big guy like myself. I take pride in learning how to move my body in all sorts of directions and mainly being able to move like a primate in the safest ways possible because lets face it, unless you're tarzan or have some secret DNA that allows you to have the tendons and muscular adaptations of a wild beast its impossible to move the same exact way a primate does. We may not be able to swing on vines gracefully but we can improvise using our structure to move through the Monkey Bars or do acrobatic feats on the swing, hang from a pull-up bar and develop powerful grip strength, Squat down and hold it like a Chimp. There are many ways to develop our own style of Primate Fitness.

Since getting back into this, I'm feeling a greater since of flexibility in my spine, my fingers are building strength in the tendons, my knees are getting stretched in the deep squat positions, my oblique are getting stronger from the hanging position, my wrists feel like solid rock, my abs are getting leaner little by little and my upper body conditioning is increasing. You don't need to be a gymnast or an acrobat to get into this, it takes practice but with the right progression for you it can make a huge difference. The power of the primate is inside all of us, whether the theory is we are descended from apes or not doesn't matter but I do believe because of the shape of them compared to us is nearly identical from the chimp and gorillas we must embrace having that possible connection.

You Deserve To Get The Most Out Of Your Hard Earned Money

I'm so F*cking psyched to share this really awesome and wonderful Idea I have for YOU this holiday season and beyond....

It's important to find the best products possible and for that I want to give something back as my gratitude and appreciation for what you decided to do.

What will happen is when you go to my Advocare Store and you make a purchase, you'll be getting more than just a product, I will personally send you a FREE WORKOUT that is circuit based and all you need is your own bodyweight. You can do this workout in the comfort of your own home and on your own schedule anytime, anywhere. If it's too difficult, let me know by email, call or text and I will send you another workout for you to start on.

I want YOU to get the most bang for your hard earned money and help you reach your goals as best as possible. You deserve to be in awesome health and whether you're a man or woman, young or old doesn't matter you will get something out of it.

Are you in sports? Building a Healthy Lifestyle? Starting a new regimen? Or just want to look awesome in your birthday suit, I will help you find the best products and workouts for your goals.

Let's work together and help you get the most out of it.